Of Baby Brain, Nannies and other Miscellany

I locked myself in my pants today. Seriously. I was literally stuck in my khakis.

It was the rubber-band trick that got me. I figured I’d wear these non-maternity khakis since they’re one of the two pairs of pre-pregnancy pants I can still get over my butt, where apparently half of my pregnancy weight is going, and my stomach, where the other half is (more understandably) showing up.

So it’s mid-morning and I make one of my many trips to the bathroom, but instead of unwinding the rubber band from around the button of my pants I somehow keep winding it around instead, and I keep doing it until it’s so tightly wrapped around it that there’s no way I can get it untangled. I actually had to leave the bathroom and cut it off. I blamed it on baby brain, since I obviously just wasn’t thinking during what should have been a fairly mindless task.

In other (better) news, I know I wrote recently about the challenges of researching good daycare. That whole issue was made even more frightening the other day when that news story came out about the 22-year-old local daycare worker who killed an 18 month old when she literally slammed him to the floor because she was frustrated with him. How utterly horrifying is that? I know a girl who actually considered that very same place for her son, who is the same age, and she was incredibly shaken by the story. Any parent would be. I mean, it’s hard enough to send your child into a stranger’s care, but many, many families don’t have a choice but to do just that, and then you hear about something like this.

Of course, even with a nanny you aren’t completely escaping that problem. But when you’re picking a nanny, the search and interview process is much more about the person herself (or himself, I suppose, but let’s be realistic here) than about the place, which is where most of the research for daycare centers focuses. I bring up the nanny thing because the other night out of the blue, Laurie called and said she and Jeff have decided not to send their girls back to his sister for another year after all. They’re going to get a nanny instead, which puts our old idea of nanny sharing back on the table.

I’m excited about it for a lot of reasons. First, because the attention is much more personal, and the kids would be at ours or their house rather than somewhere that could be farther away. Also, they can do personalized outings, there won’t be a room full of kids who will be getting sick all the time, and the kids can all get to know their cousins (well, as much as an infant can “know” people, I suppose).

So the four of us are going to get together next Friday and talk details: how it might work, what kind of person we’d want to find, what hours we’d want them to cover, and of course, how the finances would work. We touched on this a little in our initial conversation. On one hand you could say they should pay 2/3 and we should pay 1/3 because they have two kids and we’ll have one. But one of their girls will be in kindergarten half the day. And babies demand a different level of care. But babies also spend a lot of time sleeping. And so on. The four of us have a very good relationship so I think these discussions will go smoothly, but I hope it doesn’t end up being the kind of thing that we could eventually fight about. Laurie has a very strong personality, but then, so can I. So we’ll see. Nothing’s definite, but I’m excited about it.

In other news, we had a doctors’ appointment this morning. Now that we have our fetal doppler, the excitement of hearing the baby’s heartbeat there isn’t as big of a deal, but it’s always nice to have the chance to ask the doctor my random questions. Unlike last time, when literally the only thing I could think of to ask was whether I could eat sausage, I had a small list this time:

• Were these new and changing moles I was getting normal or should I see a dermatologist? (They were fine; I’ve read in multiple places that moles can get darker or more numerous during pregnancy, but it’s always good to have them checked out).
• Were there any yoga moves I shouldn’t be doing during pregnancy? (My doctor asked if I was doing prenatal yoga classes and I said, no, just the yoga on Wii Fit. She said the poses should be fine unless they put too much pressure on my abdomen or cause me to really bear down. As far as poses that start on my back, she said I’d feel it when I shouldn’t be doing those anymore).
• Should I stop drinking my two caffeine-free Diet Cokes a day and cup or two of decaf coffee because of the artificial sweeteners in the soda and small amounts of caffeine in the coffee? (No and no).
• Was my 10-pound weight gain at 16 weeks and 5 days too much? (For now it’s fine, she said, but she added that it should start to taper off. I wonder how or why that would happen, though, since I can’t see myself starting to be less hungry…)

And that was it. The really big part of the visit came at the very end, when we scheduled our next appointment. Yes, four weeks from today, on Feb. 19, we’ll find out the answer to that eternal question: pink or blue?

Ups and Downs

Well, yesterday was an up-and-down day. I took it pretty easy since I was off work and I was having these pains on my lower left side. I was pretty sure I’d probably just pulled something, but I wanted to avoid any heavy activity just in case. I actually did call the doctor’s office to ask them about it. I was hoping to talk to one of the nice nurses and just have her reassure me that everything was fine, but instead, new creepy doctor that I don’t like was the only one there, and he called back himself. He said I could come in and be checked out if I wanted, but they were pretty full so I might have to go to the ER. He also said I could make an appointment for tomorrow (now today).

But the thing is, I didn’t really think anything was wrong, I just wanted someone to tell me so. Plus, I get the feeling this guy is just starving for patients since he’s new to the practice, so no matter what you call about, he’ll always want to see you. Last time I called and got him, when I was just about 6 weeks and having some back pain, he told me to come in and then all he did was a quick vaginal exam (which took me off guard because what was he going to learn from that, and I’d never had a man do one, which was fine, but I wasn’t quite prepared). Then he said since it hurt when I moved and based on the location it was probably just muscular. Well, he could’ve told me that on the phone based on what I told him rather than getting all up in my private parts, couldn’t he?

The day did end on a very positive note. Andy and I exchanged our holiday stockings, a tradition we started the first year we were dating. Since I’m Jewish and he’s Methodist, we chose Dec. 23 (Festivus!) as our gift-giving day. It works out nicely because we can have the day to ourselves – there aren’t usually other family obligations for Chanukah or Christmas. His gifts for me were so cute and sweet. He had a tupperware box labeled “emergency pregnancy car kit” with all kinds of snacks and treats, plus things like kleenex and band-aids. So adorable. There was also a T-shirt he’d ordered from Cafe Press that said I and then a heart and then a picture of a burger. I loved it since I am a burger fiend! It was so hilarious. I’m totally wearing it Friday when we have our friends over.

But the last gift at the very bottom of the stocking was probably the best. I unwrapped it and saw that he’d gotten me my very own fetal Doppler so we could hear the baby’s heartbeat whenever we want throughout the rest of the pregnancy! We rushed upstairs and lubed it up (literally, using K-Y). It took awhile, and I thought at first that we weren’t going to be able to find it. First we found mine, which we could tell wasn’t the baby’s since it was so much slower. But then, very low on the right side, there it was! Boom-boom-boom-boom-boom-boom! We sat and listened for awhile; we were so pleased with ourselves! What a great way to end our Festivus celebration.