The Three Musketeers

Lexie, Annabelle (l.) and Maddie at her first birthday party.

After Mommy, Daddy, and of course, Jennifer (our fantastic nanny), Lexie’s two favorite people in the world are her cousins, Maddie and Annabelle. After all, she’s spent the better part of most every day with them since she was 11 weeks old.

Maddie, who is 7, and Belle,  who recently turned 4, are delightful – if at times challenging – kids, and spending time with them always makes me both fearful and excited for the years ahead with Lexie (and her future sibling). Watching how they interact with each other and how Lexie reacts to them is a funny, scary and highly educational experience (and sometimes makes me hope our next child is a boy so we don’t have to deal with sisterly squabbling).

Today, we all got to hang out for awhile when Andy and I met Laurie and Jeff for lunch and playtime at the park with the girls. The scene when Maddie and Annabelle walked into Potbelly was typical: Lexie’s face broke into an excited grin when she spotted them, and she called out, “Belle!” (It’s one of her favorite words these days. When we read a book, she often points to little girls and pronounces, “Belle!”)

The girls were all over her as usual, shouting hellos, hugging, patting and otherwise pawing at her as they (especially Annabelle) tend to do. Andy and I do a lot of eyebrow-raising over these enthusiastically physical displays of affection – it seems like that kind of high-decibel, body-rattling attention would be rather overwhelming all day long for a 1 year old – but Lexie is used to it, continuing on with her eating, reading or whatever else she’s doing with impressive equanimity. I love that she’s learned to stay calm amid the chaos that defines gatherings of more than two kids under 10.

At lunch and later, at the park, I felt like taking notes as Laurie and Jeff deftly fielded potential conflicts: heading off Maddie getting upset because she wanted her own sandwich instead of sharing one with Belle by promising, “I’ll buy you more if you finish that half”); calming Belle’s tears when Maddie pushed her down while rushing to climb a piece of equipment: “It was an accident, honey”; Jeff making sure to split time with the girls when Maddie was riding on his back and Laurie offered to take Belle but “No, I want Daddy!”

On days like today when we’re all together, it often exhausts me just thinking about the difference between our busy-but-manageable life now chasing after Lexie and keeping her content and what lies ahead once we have two kids with their own needs, agendas, and of course, the all-important ability to talk back.

But on the flip side, I also get to see all the great benefits Lexie is getting – and will get in the future – from spending so much time with these two special girls. First and foremost, of course, they adore her (even Belle, who took a bit of time to warm to the idea of this tiny intruder taking over her status as baby of the family).

They encourage her and watch out for her; they teach her practical skills like patience and sharing and fun skills like making faces and feeding her baby doll; and they make her laugh and laugh, maybe even more than the funniest man on Earth (Daddy, of course).

Of course, I know there’s a down side to come, too. When little kids – especially girls – spend a lot of time with older kids, they tend to grow up a little faster, or at least be aware of more-grown-up things than they otherwise would be. But with all the positive effects that have and will come from this three-way relationship that Maddie, Annabelle and Lexie are building, I guess I’ll just have to suck it up and deal with the day she comes home begging for Hannah Montana diapers and asking if we can post pictures of the Jonas Brothers in her crib.

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